As I sit here studying for Medical Terminology, Statistics, and Child Health and Nutrition, thinking about how very stressed I am during my "year off" from nursing school, I can't help but wonder if I am making the right decision. Do we put too much on ourselves for a reward in the future? Does this keep us from enjoying life here and now and enjoying our children while they are little?
I recently finished my first year of nursing school. This past July actually. My daughter is now 3, and I am a single mother. Giving her the devotion she deserves and the attention I so desperately want to give her has been nearly impossible. In fact, without the huge involvement from my family, it would have been impossible. I love nursing. I leave stressful clinicals feeling like even though they were hard and they pushed me to the limit, I did an amount of good for someone else and that is where I am supposed to be. The medical profession has always really pulled me in for as long as I can remember.
Right now though, I find myself wondering if it is worth it. I'm taking BSN classes this year so that I can spend more time with Reagan before she starts preschool. The idea being that while she's in school 5 days a week it will be much easier for me to be away from home for classes and clinicals. I know it is worth it in the long run, but my goodness I would love at this moment to go back to cosmetology school and finish and be done with school forever a year from now.
So my question to other parents is, do you feel like your education or job or any other major stressors take away too much time from your children? When you have 489339 other things tugging for your attention, how do you live intentionally with your little ones and let them know they are a priority too? How do you keep your sanity??
Maybe this isn't the norm, but I would much rather stay home every day and be with my sweet little (sometimes frustrating) princess than be at school or work or anywhere else. I know this too shall pass, but some days I want to take off all my other hats and just be a parent and be present. They're only little once, right?